8 Steps to Access Internal Freedom

Discovering that my body speaks to me and is always leading me to my higher good is like winning the lottery.  After I graduated from high school, I spent a few months in Australia.  This was the first time in my life that I wasn’t surrounded with constant chaos.

 Upon returning home, I went with a friend to a relative’s celebration for joining the army.  While I was there, I began to feel deeply ill and light-headed and like I was going to vomit. I told a long-time family acquaintance that I wasn’t feeling well and that I would have to leave.  As I began to get closer to my car, I noticed I was feeling better, and by the time I got into the car, I was feeling 100% fine again!

Our bodies are always giving us signals to guide us away from people, places and things that don’t serve us and lead us to our highest good.

Here is an exercise to help you gain better communication with your body, build your intuition and trust yourself.  Using your body as a compass, you can navigate through any difficult situation on your way to greater fulfillment and success in life.

  1. Sit down, close your eyes and take three deep breaths from your diaphragm.
  2. Think about something you love.
  3. Fully experience what it is you love. Say, “I love……
  4. Notice the signs you receive when you tell yourself a truth. Do you see an image? What physical sensations do you feel? Do you feel relaxed? What do you see, hear, smell and/or taste?
  5. Now get up and walk around for a few minutes to clear your experience.
  6. After a few minutes sit down, close your eyes and take three deep breaths.
  7. Tell yourself that you hate what you just told yourself you loved. In other words, tell yourself a lie.
  8. Notice the signs your body gives you when you hear the lie. Do you see an image? What physical sensations do you feel? Do you feel heavy? What do you see, hear, smell and/or taste?

Practice and have fun with this:-)

Your soulfit siser,


52 Ways to Freedom

Resolve CodependencyThis is the Age of Healing and Joy.  It is time to start remembering who you are and to start feeling and tuning into the truth which exists within you. Here are 52 of the best practices to resolve codependency to set yourself free and step into “living” your own life.  When you learn how to say no, create healthy boundaries, speak your truth and live on purpose,you resolve codependency and heal at a soul level.

1. Write in a journal daily. You’ll meet an interesting person, yourself!

2. Detach from the unhealthy relationships in your life.

3. Practice daily acknowledgements. Stop diminishing even the small wins.  You are worth celebrating.

4. Develop an attitude of gratitude.

5. Give yourself permission to say no.

6. The love we give and receive will be enhanced by the love we give ourselves.

7. Give yourself the gift of forgiving yourself and forgiving others.

8. Write your empowering life story.

9. Do what scares you most.  Allow yourself to expand and grow.

10. Create healthy boundaries and honor yourself by keeping them.

11. Don’t hurt yourself, don’t hurt anyone else and don’t let anyone hurt you.  These are nonnegotiable boundaries.

12. Self appreciation is the road to self love.

13. Develop an unshakeable faith.  Then do something to exercise that faith.

14. Accept yourself fully by listening to your truth and acting accordingly.

15. See yourself as courageous.

16. Protect yourself from negative influences.

17. Allow yourself to mess up, make mistakes and learn from them.

18. Instead of judging yourself, recognize your strengths.

19. Don’t let fear throw you off balance. Fear is only False Evidence Appearing Real.

20. Lift weights. This is a miracle drug in my opinion.

21. We are all children of God who deserve to be happy!

22. Thank God for our egos. They are what allowed us to survive.

23. We are spiritual being and we are here in these bodies, at this time, to do this healing.

24. We must be willing to go to our core of peace in order to heal.

25. When we become willing to feel the pain, then we become capable of feeling the joy!

26. Learn to say with trust and confidence, This is how I feel.

27. The past doesn’t equal the future Every day is an opportunity to start over!

28. Walk toward what feels comfortable to your heart, mind, body and soul.

29. Stop waiting for someone else to come along and rescue you.  Rescue yourself.

30. Let God and your intuition lead the way.  Ask for guidance.

31. God, take care of me those moments when I cannot find the will to take care of myself.

32. Let go of your expectations of others.  Except what is.

33. God, show me how letting go can benefit my life.

34. Release beliefs that are holding you back.  Feed your mind empowering messages.

35. Grieve clean pain and disbelieve dirty pain

36. Allow yourself to fully express all emotions of life.  Freedom follows.

37. Set an intention and practice it until it becomes a habit.

38. Stop taking everything personally.

39. Contribution to oneself and to others is the ultimate secret to joy!

40. Your purpose in life does not change, is eternal and is available to you each and every moment.

41. Exercise your power of CHOICE. Take personal responsibility for all the results in your life.

42. Provide your body with the core nutrients it really needs; water, oxygen/breathing, vitamins and minerals, live alkaline foods and exercise.

43. Laugh deeply and have more fun!

44. It’s in the struggle that we forge the greatest parts of our character.

45. Craft a new story and vision for yourself.

46. Deep pain opens a well. What are you going to fill it with?

47. Embrace your creativity and imagination.  Your body and soul will thank you.

48. Shake it off and come back to life. This is your time!

49. Say woohoo for no reason….and live with excitement.

50. Surround yourself with people who add value to your life.

51. Try something new.

52. It’s our job to find an empowering meaning of why we are here!

I invite you to share your experiences with me as you implement what resonates with you.

Whick one will you choose to practice today?

Your SoulFit Sista,


Happty New Year: Walk These 7 Steps With Me

Happy New Year, SoulFit Sista!

I was 8 years old and racked with sobs outside my first foster home.  I don’t remember what happened but I do remember how I felt.  I felt like my little body was going to break apart from the inside out.  I didn’t know it was possible to feel this kind on physical pain.   Alone, and frightened, I felt completely unwanted.

  And—as if specifically designed to heal my pain—a powerful thought came pounding into my head: “Don’t believe it!  It’s not true!  Think about where you want to be—and one day you will be there!” I looked into the sky, filled with an unprecedented sense of calm, and vowed that I would find my way out to a better place—and that when I did, I would bring others along with me.

That epiphany taught me the power of my mind.  I learned that I could evict self-abusive thought patterns and replace them with empowering beliefs. I learned that, no matter what the external circumstances might be, I could step into the vibration of love and feel good on the inside.

 I discovered that I could become my own healer, with my heart, hands & mind.

Although it wasn’t always easy, hell it still isn’t :-)…

I’ve learned that it’s a practice to tap into the thoughts that create a feel good sensation inside.  As a kid, touching my heart helped me feel calm and peace inside.  Then I would think about my future life and knew that this ability to feel that good when my circumstances weren’t pleasant would take me far in life.  I would give thanks for my future and the rocks I loved to play with in my present life.

Thinking about you’re desires as if you are living them out Now, can do the same for you.

Most people are going about happiness and fulfillment the wrong way.  More than any other time of the year, at the beginning of each New Year, this is most prevalent.

So let’s walk these 7 steps together!

  • Think of yourself in the future experiences that you desire as if you are living it NOW.  Tap into when you were a child and open up to your imagination. Focus on your breath as feel good sensations stir inside your body.
  •  Get still and allow yourself to hear what your heart is trying to tell you.  Touch your heart if it feels right.  What does your heart yearn for?  Don’t dismiss what comes up for you.
  •  Once you’ve identified what your heart yearns for, RESOLVE to receive it.  This is the only New Year’s resolution you will ever need.  Put it in your back pocket and remember this.
  • Make it a daily practice to “play “and pretend that you already have whatever it is that you want. See yourself living the experiences that your heart is guiding you towards.
  • . After you’ve spent at least 5 minutes picturing your desired life fulfilled, release the image and rub your hands together to return fully to this present moment.
  • All these steps are important but I learned that this can be the most powerful of them all.  This is to be ok with whatever is going on in your life.  Find ways to accept your current situation and allow yourself to feel any raw emotions that you maybe suppressing.
  • This step was the catalyst in order for me to get to a better place in life.  Allow your heart, soul and entire being to be filled with gratitude.  Be grateful for the not so pleasant because you can learn from the experience.  Be grateful for the good that is in your life.  For me, in the beginning, all I could find were those rocks to be grateful for. This helped me to feel better too. Look for something and you’ll find it.  Be grateful for the life you will be living in the future, your desires fulfilled.

I invite you to practice getting to your “feel good” zone as often as possible. This way you are creating happiness and fulfillment in the moment.  Then doing what it takes to reach your goals and not the other way around.

No more chasing your desired emotional state by “thinking” if you get “there” you will then be happy.

We get to climb out of this rabbit hole together!

This will not only make for a kick@ss New Year!  But can forever change your life for the better.

What are your intentions for 2013?  Share below and I’ll help hold your intention for the New Year!

Your SoulFit Sista,


Quiz: How Well Do Your Manage Your Energy?

When the seemingly relentless demands at work and burdens of  a busy life take their toll on work performance, we tend to think that managing  our time better will improve the situation.  If we can just work faster,  multitask more efficiently, things will be better, we think, as we buy the  latest time management gadget or software.

However, as Jim Loehr and Tony Schwartz, authors of The Power of Full Engagement, explain,  it is the skillful management of energy,  not time, that most significantly affects high performance. Too often, we  squander this valuable resource through energy-taxing habits — physical,  emotional, mental and spiritual habits.

Take this Self-Quiz to see how well you are managing your  energy

1.  I rely on sugary  or carbohydrate-rich snacks for bursts of energy when I need an energetic  pick-me-up.

2.  Life is an endless  marathon to be endured;  you just have to  keep on running.

3.  I tend to do what  feels immediately pressing and easier to accomplish rather than make  intentional choices about how I spend my time and what matters most.

4.  I hate routines;  they’re too much like being stuck in a rut.   I prefer to be loose and spontaneous.

5.  I’m so busy I  rarely have time to reflect on what I value most deeply.

6.  I seem to be stuck  in overdrive; I feel like I’ve lost the ability to shift to any other gear.

7.  I work out  (cardiovascular and weight training) irregularly, if at all.

8.  I regularly get  less than six hours of sleep.

9.  I rarely take  breaks; that way, I can get more done.

10.  When I take the  time to notice, my breathing seems shallow; I seem to go a long time without  taking a deep breath.

11.  Anxiety,  frustration and overwhelm seem ever-present for me.

12.  When I’m under  pressure, I easily become harsh or defensive with others.

13.  Personal  relationships are not something I devote a lot of energy to.  If they don’t work, I move on.

14.  I smoke and/or  drink; to be honest, doing so really helps lower my anxiety level.

15.  It’s been a long  time since I’ve done something purely because it was enjoyable or felt good.

16.  Downtime is  wasted time.

If you answered “true” to more than three of these  statements, you’re probably not performing — or feeling — as well as you  could be.  Take time now to brainstorm ways to practice self-care and enhance your ability to create the energy you desire from within!

Your SoulFit Sista,


10 treats for me on Halloween

Halloween is a holiday with ancient roots that had a much greater meaning than the costume filled holiday that we know today

Around 2,000 years ago, the Celts, who lived in what is now the United Kingdom, Ireland, and northern France, had a festival commemorating the end of the year. Their New Year was November 1, and this festival was called Samhain, pronounced sow-en. The end of their year signaled the end of summer, the end of the harvest season, and the beginning winter.

They believed the night before the New Year, that the wall between the living and the dead was open.

Samhain was considered a magical holiday.

Many families will be taking their little ones trick or treating.  Maybe you will be going to a Halloween party?

Or maybe you will do what I’ll do and go over to a friends house and pass treats out to all the delicious children dressed up for a night of trick or treat!  Our daughters are best friends.  The dads are hitting the streets with our girls and we are dishing out the good stuff:-)

Trick or Treat?  What’s it’s going to be?

Do you trick yourself into believing reasons why you can’t have more fun?

Do you trick yourself into staying quiet when your soul whispers are nudging you to speak up?

Do you trick yourself into saying, “Yes” when inside your head you said, “No?”

Do you trick yourself into rejecting compliments from others?

Do you trick yourself into withholding sexual pleasure from yourself?

Treats for me on Halloween

  1. Embrace my inner darling and dress up!  She’s excited!  We’re both excited!
  2. Help out at Autumn’s class Halloween party!
  3. Play Halloween makeup artist to Autumn and Charlie!
  4. Pass out treats to the kids dressed up for Halloween fun!
  5. Accept and receive compliments!
  6. Enjoy being with my family and friends!
  7. Smile at a stranger!
  8. Write myself a love letter!
  9. Howl at the moon!
  10. Have fun!



For me, Halloween is a day for fun!

What do you love about Halloween?

What tricks have you played on yourself?

What treats will you give yourself?


Your SoulFit Sista,






You Have Unlimited Power Within You!

An Oriental fable tells of the ancient gods trying to decide where to hide the power of the universe so that man would not find it and use it destructively.

One god said, “Let us hide it on top of the highest mountain.” But they decided that man would eventually scale the highest mountain and find this great power.

Another god said, “Let us hide this power at the bottom of the sea.” Again it was decided that man would eventually explore the depths of the sea.

Still a third god suggested, “Let us hide the great power of the universe in the middle of the Earth.” But they realized that man would someday conquer that region, too.


Finally, the wisest god of all said, “I know what to do. Let us hide the great power of the universe within man. He will never think to look for it there!”

According to this old fable, they did hide the power of the universe within man, and it is still there.

“Looks like they were right, so many people never realize that the great power of the universe – the power to destroy or heal, have lack or abundance – lies within them.”

You have unlimited ability to heal your life and experience more joy. Start by being mindful of your words and connect with the love in your heart.

Your soulfit sista,


3 Steps to Enhancing Your Belief in Yourself Through Tough Times

Your mindset will determine your level of success, or lack thereof.  A positive mindset can empower you to abolish hurdles before they become too challenging.  It may be difficult to believe in yourself when everything around you seems to be crumbling into pieces, but keeping faith is the only way to make it through the hard times and see yourself clear to better days.

Try these strategies to help you remain steadfast when you’re feeling the pressure of tough times:

1. Reflect on the past

 Surely you’ve encountered seemingly insurmountable situations in the past. How have you succeeded in the most unpleasant scenarios? Clearly, your ability to overcome these situations speaks loudly for your strength and abilities.

In some situations, you may be able to emulate your past solutions by adapting them to fit your current situation. Other times, you’ll be able to learn what not to do from past trials and tribulations.  The past does not have to dictate your future.

2. Act immediately

 Rather than retreating into your personal cocoon when a situation becomes intimidating, address it immediately. The longer you allow a situation to sit without attention, the more urgent it will become.

Avoid cornering yourself with urgency by creating a proactive plan now. Or better yet, have a just-in-case plan before the event ever happens.  It’s okay to take a few hours to create a plan of attack. But if you’re still brainstorming weeks from today, you may be stalling.

Only you can be the source of a solution.  You are in charge of managing your life and ensuring its successTake pride in this power. After all, you’re free — no one commands you! Your life is what you make it.  And you can use your power to start off on the right foot each and every day.

3. Believe it

You will make it through. You’ve found your way out of a tough situation before. You’ll do it now, and again sometime in the future.  There is always a way to get your head above the water — always and to thrive in life.  You’ll get better at it once you seek to gain a new perspective.

As Bernice Johnson Reagon once said, “Life’s challenges are not supposed to paralyze you; they’re supposed to help you discover who you are.”

Now is as good a time as any to show yourself what you’re made of. Confirm to yourself that you’re as strong and tenacious as you suspect yourself to be.

Everyone encounters hard times — it’s simply a part of life.  And a very major part of how you will address these hard times is dependent on your mindset and your ability to believe in yourself, even throughout the toughest of times.

Your mindset can be your best friend or your worst enemy.

If you allow your mindset to shift into negative territory, you’ll end up with negative results.  Remember, you attract the energy you exude!

Take a moment and think of a time when you shifted your perspective on an otherwise disastrous situation, and everything worked out beautifully.  Is there a challenge you are facing now that by shifting your perspective can shine a light on a solution you may have overlooked?

Your soulfit sista,


Number One Best Practice to Moving Beyond “Stuck”

This week I have spoken with many women who say  that they feel  “stuck” and that they don’t know what to do.

When I ask them to  describe it, there was a  common thread.  Each woman said they felt   something heavy on their heart.  And a  few of them said that they were  unaware of this.  I told each woman to open up their hearts to the  gift  of release.

If you are feeling “stuck” in any area in your  life, first I  want you to know that “stuck” is an illusion.

“Stuck”  only exists when we think of the past or jump into the  future.  Stuck  implies not moving forward and judging where you are now  based on a projection  into the future.  Be mindful and  conscious of  the moment with each breath you take.

Relax!  And affirm  peace.   The number one best  practice for never being stuck again is to use  your gift of release.   Your own gift of release is available on the   mental, emotional and physical planes of life.   The act of release  helps you to become an open, receptive channel  through which the  intelligence of the universe can flow to you to cleanse your  life of  worn-out relationships and conditions and make a way for new and expanded good in your life.

Affirming release  is the best medicine I know to heal emotional scars and move beyond being  stuck.

Write  these words of release on a card and carry it with you.  It  would be a good idea to also place another  card by your bed.  Read it  upon waking up  and before you go to bed.  This is the affirmation  I  used when my life was not where I wanted it to be.  It changed my life.

“I Let Go Of Everything And Everybody  That Is No Longer A Part  Of The Divine Plan Of My Life.  I Now Expand Quickly Into The Divine  Plan Of  My Life, Where All Conditions Are Permanently Perfect.”

Your soulfit sista,


8 Practices to Become More Resilient

Major disruptions are shocks we all experience at one time or another in our lives. We get fired, laid off or passed over; a loved one dies, leaves or gets in trouble; a project stalls or gets canceled.  The list, unfortunately, is endless.

For some, the impacts of these hard times are overwhelming.  Recovery, if it comes at all, can be painfully slow.  Others show resilience and are admirably able to glide through these times fairly easily, bouncing back to a normal life again quickly.

Resilience — the strength required to adapt to change — acts as our internal compass so we can resourcefully navigate an upset.

As bad as it may be, know it could always be worse.  For me, the first 10 years of my life were the worst.  Even though my life continued to be difficult and unhealthy in later years, I would tell myself it’s better than what it used to be.  I used my improved situation (although still difficult) as evidence for a better future when I grew up.

When unexpected events turn life upside down, it’s the degree to which our resiliency comes into play that makes these “make-or-break” situations an opportunity for growth.

The good news is that each of us has the capacity to reorganize our life after a disruption and to achieve new levels of strength and meaningfulness.

Though it’s easy to feel vulnerable in the midst of chaos and uncertainty, life disruptions are not necessarily a bad thing because they help us grow and meet future challenges in our lives.

It’s a lot like a bone that was once fragile or broken, and is now healed and strong from being used.

So how can you become more resilient?  Here’s a look at eight key characteristics of people who demonstrate resilience during life’s upheavals.

1. Live in the present moment

Your awareness is completely centered on the here and now.  You are not worrying about the future or thinking about the past. When you live in the present, you are living where life is happening.  The past and future are illusions, they don’t exist.  As the saying goes, “tomorrow never comes.”  Tomorrow is only a concept.  Tomorrow is always waiting to come around the corner, but around that corner are shadows where you cannot see, because time is always now.

2. A Sense of Hope and Trust in the World

Practice gratitude for yourself, for others and for life.  Resilient people rely on their belief in the basic goodness of the world and trust that things will turn out all right in the end. This positive attitude allows them to weather difficult times when everything seems bleak and to look for and accept the support that is out there. This approach toward the world gives them the ability to hope for a better future.

3. Interpreting Experiences in a New Light

Act as if you have the tools to survive, even when you have your doubts.  The ability to look at a difficult situation in a new way (a skill called “reframing”) can minimize the impact of that situation.  Resilient people take a creative approach toward solving a problem and don’t always use an old definition for a new challenge.  They see good coming to them and are ready to receive.  Expectations determine outcome, always!

4. A Meaningful System of Support

One of the best ways to endure a crisis is to have the support of another person who can listen and validate your feelings.  Knowing that others care and will come to our support decreases the feeling of isolation, especially when tackling a problem alone.  It’s important to choose people you trust.  Don’t be surprised if it takes several friends, each of whom can provide different kinds of support.  Resilient people aren’t stoic loners.  They know the value of expressing their fears and frustrations, as well as receiving support, coaching or guidance from friends, family or a professional.  They value other people and reach out when in need.

5. A Sense of Mastery and Control Over Your Destiny

You may not be able to predict the future, but you can tackle a problem instead of feeling at the mercy of forces outside of your control.  Resilient people know that ultimately their survival and the integrity of their life values depend on their ability to take action rather than remain passive. Tough times call for you to tap into your own sense of personal responsibility and see life as self-determined and forever challenging.

6.  Self-Reflection and Insight

Life’s experiences provide fertile ground for learning.  Asking yourself questions that invite introspection can open a door to new understanding and an appreciation of who you are and what you stand for.  Giving voice to your thoughts and feelings leads to insight and helps transform the meaning of a problem into something useful.  Resilient people learn from life situations and do not succumb to punishing themselves because of decisions made in the past. They show courage to feel and love in the midst of adversity.

7. A Wide Range of Interests

People who show resilience in the face of adversity are those who have a diversity of interests.  They’re open to new experiences and ideas.  Because their lives are rich and varied, it’s easier for them to find relief from single mindedness and worry that often accompany a crisis.  Resilient individuals have a good sense of their needs, limits, and boundaries.

8. Sense of Humor

Have you ever had a wary laugh during a difficult situation?  The ability to see the absurdity, irony, or genuine humor in a difficult situation stimulates our sense of hope and possibility.  Humor has both psychological and physical benefits in relieving stress because it encourages a swift change in your perception of your circumstances.  When your thoughts change, your mood follows.

If you look to improve these eight areas now, rather than when adversity pays a visit, you’ll be able to bounce back more quickly.   By practicing resilience you will re-pattern your attitudes and actions for positive change.

Your soulfit sista,



It’s Time to Ground Yourself

Place your feet firmly on the floor and feel your body as it is energized by Mother Earth.

 Focus your connection to source. Follow this connection down to the core of the Earth and feel her roots.

You will tap into an energy source that never runs out and is always there for you.

This is very nourishing to the soul. Imagining you are wearing red slippers will help you to remain grounded and act as a reminder that source energy is here to love and sustain you.

Now, imagine yourself strong, powerful, accessing your voice and owning your truth – Who would you be? What would you do?

Your soulfit sista,